During the time between my last post and now, I have experienced many things and gone through many situations- most recently this week has made me grow so much. I am graduating from high school, and am attending college in the fall. Recently, my friends and I have hung out together lately and i have found myself in situations that I have never really assessed. I have been in those situations with bad things before, and in the past i was able to say no simply because my parents gave me the instructions and guidelines that was wished upon me. Now, that I am becoming an adult and making choices for myself, I faltered and did those bad things. After all of it, I felt incomplete and felt it was pointless- little side note, DON'T DO IT! Yet, as much as I can put the blame on others and peer pressure as much as I want, the fact is that I chose to put the cup and the pipe to my lips, nobody else. Sure, it may have been something that was provoked, but I made the choice.
A couple days after this incident, I confessed to my parents- although the anger was expected, something else was not- my parents told me that they could not criticize me for what they have done as well, but that I was ONE MY OWN and that whatever choices i made affected me and only me. The choices I make will affect my future, and that is how it is going to be. Both of my parents are right- I am an adult, and now that life is up to me, the choices I make will affect ME. If I decide in bad choices, severe consequences will fall onto me- if I decide in good choices, then great rewards will follow. I want to succeed in life, and I have never been more excited to go to college. I am not going to let anything screw that up for me, and I will make the right choices.
I had a HUGE learning experience, and I didn't quite understand the severity of my upcoming future until now- now it is time for me to step up to the plate. No one is going to do anything for me, and life is how you make it. It is the hardest thing to seperate from your friends of one and a half years, but I know in the end it is the healthiest thing for me. I need this, and I know that my future is brighter because of the choice that I have made. I'm not doing this for anyone, not for my parents- but for me. Thank god I caught myself in time before I fell down that hole- because if you fall down too far, it becomes too difficult to pull yourself out.
-Black Cat